I don't abide by sweeping, astrological generalizations, and as an astrologer I find myself breathless when rushing to explain why your sun sign is a small part in astrology. I am constantly asked questions about compatibility, which is honestly bullshit too, as we each have soul contracts and timing more intricate and designed than simple commonalities between signs. If you are in a relationship, it has nothing to do with compatibility or convenience, and so much more to do with the lessons both parties require for individual growth. I do, however, think it is important to note the differences each sign experiences when embarking on the deeply terrifying, deeply entangling and revealing conquest that is intimacy.
The preexisting patterning for the Scorpio Lover is based on the fear of abandonment, vulnerability and lack of control. A lot of Scorpios dealt with these themes in early childhood. In psychology, we look to childhood for early pointers of the relational patterns repeated in adulthood. In astrology, we believe that the pattern was chosen long before childhood, but we can look at childhood for a simplistic expression of these archetypes- because they are actually occurring within us. If you are intimately involved with a Scorpio, there is an aspect of yourself that is eager to know your own intensity, your own power, your own relationship to abandonment and control. This is your shit, not there's.
The Scorpio’s purpose in the zodiac is to transform from the inside out. To experience so much inwardly, that one has to alchemize and become someone else completely . To live eight lifetimes in one. To regenerate. To die through sex, through change, through trauma, through catastrophe. And throughout these feats, most of which would terrify the majority of the zodiac, they additionally must learn how to be truly and deeply known by another.
The Scorpio has the depth and mental agility to be able to keenly observe the psychological behavior of their partners, whilst maintaining one eye inward, looking for interior indicators of lies, betrayal and any energetic imbalances between the outside and the inside. A lot of relationships with Scorpios involve the undercurrents of what is happening behind the exterior: what isn’t being said, what can’t be revealed and what doesn’t meet the eye. Almost as if most of the relationship exists underwater, exists in the psychic and in the things that are intangible and unspoken. The Scorpio, ruled by Pluto and Mars, is the sign most aware of it's own mortality. Imagine if, at all moments, you were keenly aware of other timelines or instances where you have died. All decisions are ruled by the instinct to survive for the scorpio. If your life was being threatened, all thoughts about finances and your neighbors would disappear in an instant. You would only be aware of your nervous system, and a forced clarity would overcome all secondary chit chat. Such is the mindset of the scorpio.
They are intense, magnetic and seem to exude an indescribable depth, and simply being in their presence pulls you underground. They seem to have been born with X-Ray No Bullshit Goggles on. Navigated correctly and healthily, the Scorpio Lover will shine a spotlight on bits of yourself buried deep beneath the surface, and take you on an all access tour of your innermost desires. Navigated incorrectly, you will be pulled into a silent power struggle, and merge so deeply that you won’t know where your feelings begin and the others ends.
Expect sudden abrupt disappearances followed by periods of melting intensity, passion and obsessive behavior. Expect them to know when your faking at anything. Expect to lose your capacity to lie. Expect to never know everything, and to learn how to be comfortable in the stagnancy of the unknown, to find solace in the dark. Expect sex that lingers with nervous system for little too long. Expect to feel watched when you are not being looked at. Expect that you elected to learn these sacred lessons, as they truly belong to you. Expect to resent the forbidden power they have. Allow yourself to greet each milestone of depth with a silent joy, with an invisible sense of achievement (this is what they do, too.)