Lessons From Venus Retrograde / by grace mcgrade

Every living thing that has ever been born, was born in a distinct location in time/space. No one will ever occupy that time or space again. It is a cosmic signature.

We are all walking around with a distinct and unique make up, that was translated and mapped out by our astrological influences the moment we were born. The stars we were born under do not define us, but the mirror us with erie precision. The stars tell our story. They are the lens through which we perceive reality. Every perception is unique.

We carry these stories internally, everywhere we go, and we trigger and fire one another up with our astrological DNA. I like to think of them as computer settings, with our minds as the projecting screen. You can never change the settings, but you can alter the brightness. Expunge the drama and live in awareness and self ownership.
Venus retrograde has been a whirlwind of synchronicitous love patterning and I adore it. When a planet goes retrograde, it hits our internal systems and pulls us in, asking us to go deeper. Venus, born from the oceans of allure, is the opulent planet of love and relationships. Venus rules materials and attracting what it is you want. Venus tells us how we attract and what we attract. When she is retrograde, she holds back on giving and allows us to examine what has already been given and the pattern .

Venus asks us: What have we already attracted and for what purpose? What is your pattern in relationships? Where does your shadow like to play? What is it you really want? Are your relationships transactional or fulfilling?

The adverse to the loving archetype of Venus, is the addict- the lover who wants to disappear into someone. The lover who wants to merge and dissolve into another, rather than staying sovereign and whole.

Do you love or do you just want to merge?

I perceive astrological transits by observing the nature of the people in my circle. There has been an increase in discussions about soulmates and twinflames (so exhausting to even begin to go into) and hot, heavy affairs with unsavory individuals. Myriads of past lovers and friends crawling up from the darkest holes in the earth. Waves of hypersexual energy and questions in regard to how we earn and spend.  All of my friends have been questioning relationships, looking at how we are unfulfilled sexually or emotionally.

In my life, Venus retrograde helped me recall an internal story.

I am awful at skin deep flings because not one part of me is skin deep. I make a terrible “other woman” because I require far more attention than any one person can offer and I have a habit of telling people the truth. This doesn’t mean people haven’t tried to wearily  condense me into these crimson archetypes, perhaps because I am tempestuous, dark and wild.

I have always found that the most beautiful things are elusive and fluctuating, water, leaves, music, fire, hair and  eyes. Things that can’t be held but just observed.Quivering and shimmering, incapable of being caught. Perhaps that’s why I allowed myself to fall for someone once,! who behaved with untimely, almost comedic evanescence.

He was a nefarious nebula of a boy.

He was hyperactive, with nervous, intense, beckoning eyes that spoke of a restlessness ill suited for this world. He’s eyes seemed to steal the light and hold it with them. He had a gaunt appearance  and a jittery presence, scattered throughout all the clouds. Something about his chaotic nature provoked a tenderness in me I hadn’t anticipated. When ever he left I was tormented by an otherworldly resonance.

A Wolf child. Almost rabid.

I didn’t understand how it was possible to feel so much for one person, a psychic kinship extending beyond my lifetime- and a passion almost unbearable to contain within my own body. There were unfamiliar currents of bliss and euphoria that were ignited by his touch. When I kissed him I saw kaleidoscopes of light fractals and colors no one else knew.

I felt so intensely  that I couldn’t only be feeling my own emotions, and I had to be feeling some of his too. And then he would disappear, and I had to learn from the pain. I learnt to contribute the feeling to a faction of myself I hadn’t explored, rather than something he took away.

Some people are so sacred they feel heavy to be around. It’s always an issue when they are blind to their own divinity, because that means they are blind to yours too. The shape of him and his words and laugh left marks all over me. I learned a holy lesson in not seeking boys and also not waiting for the wind to carry them to me. I am intrinsically connected and I carry the essence of the universe in my hands and sometimes people don’t want to look at that or feel it.

Venus retrograde told me to stop lowering and compromising my vibration and magic for people who cannot meet me at mine.

Everyone in our lives is an extension of ourselves, and we operate in a frequencial nature. Relationships are frequencial agreements. When we engage with another, we co-create reality. If someone isn’t of the mindset that life is inherently miraculous, ebbing and flowing in the direction of their attention, when you are with them- don’t expect miracles.

My favourite people in the world are the ones who see life as their dream: an outward projection of the luminous soul material that resides inside them. They approach reality with a playful sense of wonder and splendor.

If people are draining you, it's your problem and your responsibility to clear it. Go where the love is and do not settle until you get there. Some boys are playgrounds and some are homes.